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I keep threatening to make a user's manual.

In addition to the enumeration of food sensitivies and a tutorial on how to tell when I've reached a point that I cannot function until I've eaten something, it could also include warnings like:

Do not ask me if my commitment ceremony involves a change in legal status. My commitment ceremony is a social and religious celebration. Any contract we sign is between us and the state and is very likely none of your business. I strongly believe that the social and legal aspects of creating families should be decoupled. Entirely.
Do not tell me plausible untruths. When your words and actions don't match, your little white lies make me think you've been...lying to me.
Do not ask me if I've lost weight. For the record, it's highly unlikely that what you are perceiving is weight loss. I've been within a ten percent of the same weight for nearly a decade. What you may be perceiving is an increase in muscle. "You look thinner" will get you snarled at. "You look stronger" might get you a kiss.
If you haven't seen me since I was twenty, it's acceptible to note that I'm looking quite "healthy". This is a polite way of saying that I no longer look like I need to be hospitalized for malnutrition, you can no longer count my ribs, and I actually have a belly.

(the "user manual" idea stolen years and years and years ago from, I believe,